Dragon Babies

Do I post?  Do I not post?  Do I post?  Do I not post?  I seriously debated on this one, but, at the end of the day, this blog is about our life and experiences in Hong Kong, both good and bad, happy and sad.

The past few weeks have been some of the saddest during our time in Hong Kong, immediately preceded by the happiest. 

I'll start by saying that for those of you who are learning about this for the first time here, we hope you understand.  While we were excited about our news and wanted to sing it from the rooftops, we followed the advice of most pregnancy books and kept our little secret to ourselves for the most part while things developed.

With that introduction, it's no secret anymore: Brian and I found out that we were pregnant on April 23rd.  I had just returned from a business trip to Germany, and was so excited to take the pregnancy test that I did not go to the bathroom for the last 6 hours of my flight, just to make SURE that I could effectively pee on the stick.  What a special moment.  After just a few minutes, Brian and I saw the sign that would change our lives forever.  We both just looked at each other, cried a little, and hugged.  We couldn't believe it.  We waited until what we thought would be a somewhat reasonable hour to be awake in the US, and proceeded to wake up each and every family member in our immediate families with the news.  I suppose this wasn't such a bad thing; better to be woken up with exciting news than bad.

It's an exciting year to be pregnant in Asia.  By the Chinese Zodiac, it's the Year of the Dragon, and, in this culture, it's considered very good luck to be born under this sign.  This is creating some problems in the hospitals though, as SO many women are pregnant that there is not enough room for all of them to give birth.  Next year, the Year of the Snake, is not such a great zodiac, so the hospitals will be less full, and all the things downstream, such as daycare space and classroom sizes, will not be as much of an issue.

We spent the next weeks excitedly preparing for the little one.  We talked a lot about the future, what this means for us, and how having a TCK (third culture kid) would be.  We took pictures of my "development" every week, and, I can honestly say, while there was no growth in my belly, other parts of my body certainly responded quicker than others.  ;)  We discussed baby names, and I even made a baby name spreadsheet (does this really surprise you??).  Brian kissed our "baby" good night every night, and we recorded videos every week as a gift for our baby for the future about what was happening in our life and how mom and dad were feeling.

Fast forward to two weeks ago... we went into the doctor for our first scan.  I should have been at about 7 weeks, and we hoped to see the flicker of light that was our baby's heartbeat.  We didn't see that, and what the doctor told us wasn't promising.  He said we were "measuring small" for our estimated due date.  We tried to stay positive, but that taxi ride home was a somber one.  I had a test that day and later in the week to measure my pregnancy hormone levels, which were luckily increasing (good sign), but not by the levels they should have been (not good sign).  The doctor recommended resting, and we scheduled another scan for 10 days later. 

Wednesday of this past week, we went in for that scan.  Brian had given our baby a pep talk every night, urging the little one to grow!!  I felt nervous all day, but approached the appointment with a hopeful heart.  When the doctor started the scan, we knew.  No flicker of light.  No heartbeat.  The doctor gave us a minute after he left the room, and I tried to hold back the tears, because I knew once they started, they weren't going to stop.  We proceeded to the doctor's office, where he told us about our options.  To be honest, I don't remember a word he said.  It was great that Brian was sitting there as well.  He was my rock that day.  The doctor asked us to schedule a follow up for the following week, but when we walked out into the waiting room of happy Asian women pregnant with their Dragon babies, I absolutely fell apart.  Brian made the appointment while I tried to find a place where I wouldn't be the conspicuous white woman totally making a spectacle of herself. 

The next thing we had to do was probably the hardest.  Having to "un-tell" people is not easy.  We had told our immediate family and a few friends, and, while it was hard to have this conversation, we are so thankful that we had shared our news with this small group.  The support that we have received is beyond words. 

The doctor recommended that if a miscarriage did not naturally happen, that at a certain point, we should schedule a D&C to remove the pregnancy.  We scheduled this for today, Thursday, the 31st.  I did this for two reasons 1) it had been over a week since the scan with no signs of the miscarriage happening on its own and 2) I have to travel to Jakarta for work next week and the thought of having a miscarriage while being so far away from home was beyond my comprehension. 

People ask about the medical care in Hong Kong, and, I have to say, it's top notch.  The doctor who we are seeing is professional and straightforward.  The hospital where we had the procedure done, Matilda Hospital, was the nicest one I have ever been in.  It's at the top of "The Peak" - if you have been to Hong Kong, you know what I am talking about.  We had a million dollar view from our room, and the chef there used to work at the Ritz, so the food was amazing (and, boy was I hungry after not being able to eat before the surgery).  Everything went well with the surgery, and, while we are still sad about losing the baby, it is nice to have some closure rather than being in this time of limbo.  The men at work have a saying they like to use - "you can't be half pregnant" - meaning, you are either in or you are out.  Well... this past week it did feel like being "half pregnant".  It's tough to be still feeling pregnant, when there is really not a baby coming.  I'm very much looking forward to feeling back to normal again.

I have to say, having the partner that I have has made this all just a little easier.  I thank my lucky stars every day for Brian.  Before I had met Brian, my friends all told me that when I found the one, it would be easy.  It was tough to see that through some of the hard times that I had, but in the end, they were right.  Every day with Brian is just another new adventure, and we get through both the good times and the bad ones with such love.  Waiting for Brian was so worth it.  The right one is the one that holds you when you are crying, makes you the grilled cheese sandwich when you are feeling weak, tells you that you are still gorgeous even though your body has changed and there is now no reason for it, and quietly returns the precious dragon baby charm that he had purchased for Mother's Day because you can't bear to look at it anymore.  He is more than I could have ever hoped for in a husband, and I know that he will make a wonderful father someday.

Are we okay?  We are getting through it.  Like any time when something tragic happens, it takes time for processing.  I have my good days and my bad ones.  The positive news is that we ARE capable of getting pregnant, and it's only a matter of time until we have a healthy pregnancy.  Thank you for all of the positive thoughts and prayers.  It means more to us than you know.

Looking forward to in-person hugs as we travel through the US in just a few short weeks.  Much love to all!

The Love Boat... in Guangzhou!

This past weekend, Brian and I attended the American Chamber of Commerce Spring Ball in Guangzhou, China.  I've been to GZ more times than I can count, but it was Brian's first trip there.  Guangzhou is just a 2 hour 15 minute train ride from Hong Kong, so it is super convenient to get there.  I have to say, I'm pretty spoiled.  Normally, when I arrive at the train station, there is a driver waiting for me holding an adidas sign, ready to take me either to the office or the factory I am visiting that day.  This time, we were on our own.  I figured, hey, taking a taxi should be no big deal.  It's what we do nearly daily in Hong Kong.  Luckily, I had asked the hotel what we should pay to get from the train station to the hotel, and they told me 20RMB (about 3USD).  When we first exited the train station, we saw a bunch of people flagging down taxis, so we figured we would do the same.  We flagged down three different ones, and their rates varied from 80RMB to a staggering 150RMB.  I think Brian finds it entertaining to see me haggle, then get pissed, in situations like this, so he just sat back and watched.  I finally got so mad that I decided we should walk to the hotel.  We walked for about 5 minutes, and then we saw the official taxi stand that we should have gone to to begin with!  There, the taxis were waiting, and when I asked the driver "how much?", he just pointed to the meter - duh.  It was 17RMB, and I'm so glad that we took the taxi, because 1) 3KM is farther than I was thinking and 2) a torrential downpour began just after we started to drive.  Deep breath, KP!

The next order of business was to get my hair done.  Now, I'm not a tomboy, but when it comes to making my hair look nice, especially for these kinds of events, I'm not the best.  So, I booked an appointment at our hotel, and went with an open mind to what the country of China could do with this Western hair.  Well, we started with teasing every last piece of my hair - I was very nervous at this point, because, well, I have a lot of hair and it was looking as if I had just stuck my finger in an electrical socket.  Next, we used nearly an entire can of hairspray on every piece of my hair.  Finally, everything was pinned up, followed by not one, but two more heavy shellac-ing's of my hair.  Needless to say, my hair did not MOVE the entire night.  But, I was happy with the result - much better than anything I could have done!  :)

After that, we got ready and headed down the the hotel bar, where I had quite a surreal moment.  In GZ, the expat community is quite close, and the footwear industry is just one happy family.  I had colleagues from both Nike and adidas there in the same bar, and it was just a really nice moment.  It was good to catch up with my colleagues from Nike, and I got to meet some new friends from the adidas side.  There are some real characters on my team, and I haven't laughed that hard in a long time.  

The ball this year had a Love Boat theme.  I originally had thought about getting an 80's-esque dress - I am so glad I didn't.  Many of the men were dressed in theme (picture white captain shirts, white shorts, and white tube socks), but all of the women just looked nice.  Good call.  We didn't have much time to find a costume for Brian either, but we did find a captain's hat in a little alley-way in Hong Kong that has any type of costume you would ever want.  Many of the men in our group wore tuxes (getting tuxes made in China is oh-so-inexpensive) with vests that they had had made that looked like life-jackets.  Brilliant!

My Captain and I

The event was LOUD.  I was getting hoarse by the end of the night trying to be heard over the speakers.  There were two Chinese bands, singing everything from Lady Gaga to Donna Summers.  They were... okay.  Brian actually got on the dance floor with me, which was a treat for sure.  Normally copious amounts of alcohol are required for an appearance from Brian Travolta, however, he busted a move relatively sober this time.  We had a blast.  :)

One of the funny parts of the evening was the concept of "the Lucky Draw".  There were about 15 different raffles, and some of them were the most random things... like 20 Dahon bikes.  These are the fold-able bikes that commuters use.  What the hell would anyone do with 20 bikes?  Even if you shared your raffle winnings with everyone at your table, you would still have 2 each.  Brian and I were hoping we would win, just so we would have the interesting problem of getting 4 fold-able bikes back to Hong Kong.  Regrettably, some other lucky table won that prize.   The other funny thing was the "value" that they assigned to all of the raffles.  For example, they put the value of one night's stay in a Presidential Suite, plus breakfast for two, at 50,000RMB (close to 8500USD).  Um, what??  Everything was so ridiculously over-inflated that I was just cracking up about the insanity of it all! 

The night eventually came to an end, and Brian and I enjoyed our night at the magnificent Ritz-Carlton, Guangzhou.  Now, before you go thinking that we are all fancy, a friend of ours had a gift certificate for a free night there, so the entire stay was gratis.  I had never stayed in a Ritz before, and, when I woke up, I told Brian that I felt like we were sleeping in the White House.  This was honestly the nicest hotel I have ever stayed in, and I've stayed in some pretty nice places.  We went downstairs for the breakfast, which was also amazing, and read the China Daily, China's English newspaper.  Quite entertaining to read highly censored, highly propaganda-ish news.  Especially entertaining was to read China's take on the US's imposition of anti-dumping measures on solar panels.  We were super curious to get back home and read the story from the US point of view.  Regardless, I think it's pretty special that we get to have these kinds of experiences, and see things from a different perspective.  In the gym, the English news is Al Jazeera, so that's also an interesting take on the world.  But, I digress...

After breakfast, we just wanted to check out a bit of the city.  I have to say, sometimes we look at each other and we are like, "so... we are in China.  How did that happen??".  This morning was one of those moments.  We were walking around, checking out all these crazy, huge, "hey - look at me" buildings, surrounded by Chinese families, listening to blaring Chinese opera music, and just trying to take it all in.  I feel so lucky to get to do this with my best friend... travelling around Europe was fantastic, but I did a lot of it on my own. There is something so special about sharing travel moments with someone, and we both just feel so lucky to have had this opportunity together.  I think that this kind of move either makes a couple or it breaks you, and Brian and I have become even closer because of it.  We truly enjoy every moment together, and all of the travel I do just makes us value every moment that we ARE together that much more.  Okay, enough sappiness, I know, barf.  

In parting... some of Guangzhou's finest:

The TV Tower... not sure how tall TV towers need to be, but check this out compared to the apartment buildings next to it... um, is this really necessary??

The Opera House... a strange cross between a motor boat and a spaceship

And my favorite part of the day (mostly because it was bloody hot) - the huge fountain that danced to Chinese Opera music.  I'm a sucker for dancing fountains, I gotta say!  :)

Enough glitz and glamor... back to sneakers and spreadsheets tomorrow.  :)

Macau!

Okay, so I'm getting a little behind in my posts, but better late than never, right?  A few weeks ago, we had the Labor Day holiday in Hong Kong, so Brian and I thought we'd make the best of an extra weekend day and head to Macau to check things out.  It's only an hour ferry ride away, but we had only been there once before.  It was our first day in Asia, and we took the ferry to Macau solely because we needed to leave Hong Kong, then re-enter, in order to activate our visas.  So, needless to say, between the jetlag and the overwhelmingness of having just moved to Asia, that trip was a bit of a blur!

The weekend was great!  Hong Kong can get a little overwhelming for me at times - the buildings are tall, the streets are narrow, and the people are everywhere!  In Macau, the buildings were shorter, the streets were wider, and there just weren't so many people.  It was a nice exhale for the weekend!  We went on this trip not really having an agenda - we just wanted to get a feel for what Macau was like and hopefully win enough at the casinos to retire early (gambling is legal in Macau, but not in Hong Kong, with the exception of underground Mah jong houses).

Because Macau was a Portuguese colony, the architecture and food are somewhat of a blend... I had just landed from Germany on Saturday, and we were in Macau on Sunday, so it was kind of surreal for me - I wasn't quite sure WHERE I was, with all the beautiful European-style churches around me!

The Grand Lisboa Casino - what a fine example of modern architecture!  ;)

 

Brian in a walkway off of the main square... Asia, or Europe??

Our first stop was lunch... which was amazing.  We went to a Portuguese restaurant and had just absolutely delicious food.  Truly a highlight of our trip!

Brian's was pork with a fried egg on top - yum!

 

Mine was cod with salmon rolled inside

After lunch, we just walked around and checked things out.  It was hotter than blazes, so our pace was a bit slower than normal, and we made a stop at the Macau Museum for a few hours, mostly because it was air-conditioned (but it was actually quite interesting!)

Sao Domingos Church

Almost everything was in three languages - Portuguese, Cantonese, and English

One of the most famous sights in Macau - ruins of Sao Paulo church

Inside the Macau Museum - porcelain from Macau - looked so similar to the Delft Blue that I grew to love in Holland!

Okay... so this was an interesting one - champion crickets from cricket fighting - they even had a video of a cricket fighting tournament - who would have guessed?  :)

As I mentioned, it was hotter than hell, so Brian got this refreshing jelly-honey-coconut-tea - interesting combination!

New and old

O for Oliver from the top of the Macau Museum

After an amazing dinner, we went to the casinos.  Just like in Vegas, there are so many things to see and do.  One of the casinos had a huge butterfly exhibit in the lobby.  This one matched my dress!

We splurged a bit and stayed at the Sofitel - amazingly nice hotel with a fantastic view... I could get used to this!  :)

Our gambling was finished in about 5 minutes... seriously.  The table limits are way higher than in Vegas, so after 4 bad hands of Black Jack, we downgraded to slot machines.  We still had a fun night, but didn't quite double our money like we had hoped.

Much like the Bellagio... there was a pretty cool fountain show in Macau... although the music selection was a little odd - "I Need a Hero" was the song we saw.

There's the Portuguese influence... but it's still Asia.  These were fish drying in the sun, which later get packaged to be sold.  Um, no thanks!

Sunday morning, we had a nice breakfast at the hotel, and then went to the Macau Tower, home of the world's highest bungee jump.  One of my colleagues from the factories had just done this and I had seen the video of his jump.  My stomach flipped over just thinking about doing this!  :)

There was a platform where you could watch the people jumping from above - it's done in a few seconds!

Last stop before we left was this odd little area called Fisherman's Wharf.  There, they had built reconstructions of buildings from many of Europe's biggest cities... there was Venice, Paris, Amsterdam, Athens... but, the strange thing was, it was completely empty!  We felt like we had walked into a Hollywood set after filming.  It was really strange, and not nearly as cool as we had hoped. 

Venice, with Amsterdam in the background...

This felt strangely like my old home in Amsterdam...

Roman ruins... or not.

We had a great time together, and need to get a few more trips on the books for the coming months.  We will definitely return to Macau, not necessarily for the gambling, but for the nice break from the craziness of Hong Kong it provides.

Rubber Rice

Funny story about English as a second language.

I have a few interns on my team, and they are working on a project about the footwear manufacturing process.  When I was in Guangzhou yesterday, they wanted to show me their presentation and get my feedback.  The presentation was actually quite good, but, during one part of it, there was a process listed that I had never heard of - a "rubber rice" treatment.  I thought, "Hmmm... is this something new?  What does this look like?", so I asked them to define what the process is.  They commented that it was when there is a rubber finish to the footwear piece, so the piece is "rubber rice".  I quickly realized that what they were trying to say was that the treatment was "rubberized"!, and said "Oh, you mean RUBBERIZED".  They said, "Yes, rubber rice!".  So... I wrote it on a piece of paper, and we all had a good laugh.  Too funny!  :)

The sights and sounds of Asia...

Caution... some of what you are about to read is graphic.  Only read if you have a strong stomach...

Since moving to Asia, we have been in sensory overload, in more ways than one.  I thought I would focus on two of the senses for this blog: sight and sound. 

We'll start with sight, because this part is a bit more humorous.  Some common things that I see:

* people wearing totally inappropriate footwear.  For example, during a race I ran here a few years ago, I saw a lady running in biking shoes.  Yes, the clip-in kind.  On a run on the waterfront several weeks ago, I saw an older gentleman running shirtless, with running shorts on, and Crocs.  Unfortunately, I didn't get any of these moments on film.  My colleague, however, did get a picture of one of these moments at the Hong Kong airport.   Working in the athletic footwear industry, this really drives me crazy!!

Yes, she is wearing Nike football boots, about 3 sizes too big - in the AIRPORT!!!

* people wearing shirts that are written in "Chinglish".  This is a combination of Chinese and English, and, though it is written in the Roman alphabet, the words do not make any sense!  The best ones are the elderly women that are wearing something that says something on the provocative side...

* crazy things at the market.  Brian and I have gotten pretty used to shopping for our meat and veggies at the market.  There is not a lot that surprises us anymore, including fish jumping right out of their tank at us (pick me, pick me!).  Last weekend, however, we did encounter a slight surprise when we saw a net full of LIVE FROGS.  hmmm... give me a few more years, and MAYBE that will sound appealing!  :)

Look carefully - they are in the back - RIBBIT!

* massive amounts of people.  Especially during our commutes, there are lots and lots of people.  I feel like a fish trying to swim upstream half the time, and people don't generally pick what side to walk on - sometimes, it's the left side, while others, it is the right.  I asked a local, and she said "just walk where you feel like".  Sheesh.  What makes things worse is that many are trying to weave through this traffic while looking at their iPhones. Head-on collision, anyone??

Okay... so that was a few of the sights... now for the sounds.

* People clearing their throats... and then the following spitting sound.  This is the one that honestly makes me gag every time.  I have to share a story on this one... during a recent dinner, I was sitting next to a gentleman that, during the course of dinner, cleared his throat then spit the "product" into his water glass FOUR TIMES.  I honestly nearly lost my dinner.  I tried not to look, but every single time I looked up to chat with the other gentlemen across the table, I could see this loogie-filled glass out of the corner of my eye.  I ended up making that one a short dinner.  Barf.

* The "walk/don't walk" signs.  When it is time to walk, the signs make this sound sort of like the little drum that the Karate Kid uses.  It's kind of catchy.

* Honking.  The taxi's are super impatient here, so when someone is trying to get out of a taxi, and there is one behind, that guy honks to let you know when you are taking too long!

* English.  Okay, so this one may come as a surprise for you, but, English is everywhere in Hong Kong.  Most of the announcements are made in Cantonese, Mandarin, and also English, so I never feel quite as clueless on public transit as I could.  :)

So... that's my short list.  I'm sure I'm leaving a few things out, which I will share at a later time.  Just a small glimpse into our life here.  :)